And do the feelings fit the circumstance?
When we’re feeling unprepared, unsure, or worried about something it can be tempting to push down the feelings and tell ourselves it will be fine.
If we share our feelings with other people a common response can be for them to tell us the same thing: Don’t worry! You’ll be great! Just be yourself! Go for it! They encourage us to relax, to have more confidence, not to underestimate ourselves.
And sometimes it is about mindset. If we have plenty of experience, evidence, examples that we are prepared and can do it, it’s absolutely time to take care of our safety instinct and that pesky voice of ‘not good enough’.
But sometimes the feelings fit the circumstances, especially if we’re doing something for the first time or stepping into a larger space - taking on new responsibilities, interviewing for a role that would be a stretch, thinking about making a leap.
In those situations, those feelings of ours make perfect sense! And ignoring them isn’t useful - the thoughts and feelings just keep circling and often get bigger and bigger.
In those situations, it’s more useful to explore why we feel that way, to get everything out of our heads and take a good look at what’s there. What parts do we feel unprepared for? What are we most worried about? What patterns are we scared will repeat themselves?
Once we can hear it or see it, it’s generally easier to figure out what to do about it. What can we prepare for? What worries are valid, and which need taking care of? What support do we need to put in place to set us up for success?
Often these actions are relatively straightforward, and more importantly, we understand why we feel the way we feel, and what we can do about it.
Are you feeling unprepared, unsure or worried about something?
Which feelings fit the circumstance?
And are there things you can do to set yourself up with the support you need?
Wishing you a wonderful week,
