Way back in the day, when my husband and I got married, we had a clear sense of what we wanted our wedding to be like - partly based on other people’s weddings, partly based on how we were as a couple, and a lot based on our budget!
We knew we wanted to do it ‘our way’ - to celebrate the start of a new chapter by bringing people that were important to us together, in a simple, relaxed, ‘us’ way.
We knew we wanted our guests to have a fun day and evening with good food and wine, and lots of laughter. To know each other and have felt a part of something personal.
When we knew that, it was easy to decide to:
Get married close to where we lived together, rather than where we grew up.
Have a simple registry office ceremony with space to have photos outside.
Book a cosy restaurant for the reception where people could easily talk with others they knew and choose their own food - including a burger option.
Save money on things we could do ourselves or in a different way - homemade invitations, a £20 pile of Costco muffins as a wedding cake, sparkling wine made by Stu’s dad with personalised labels made by his mum.
Both do speeches in our own way - early on so we could relax.
It was wonderful to bring the experience we wanted to life, and so much easier because we knew what we were trying to achieve, and how we wanted it to feel.
More and more I notice how useful this is in so many areas of life - not just for a milestone gathering. Deciding where to go on holiday, what to look for in a role, exploring a career change, knowing where to focus our time and energy...
When we’re faced with a sea of options it can be hard to know which one to pick, so we can get stuck in overwhelm.
It’s easier to choose if we’ve created a clear brief - starting from the inside, and then seeing how it applies to what’s available on the outside.
It’s easier to know what matters and what doesn’t, to make choices, to filter options, to decide.
It’s easier to have the experiences we want in life.
So, if you are stuck in a sea of options, take a moment to step back and think about what you’re wanting to achieve, and how you want to feel as a result. It's a beautiful starting point to filter your choices and find what you’re looking for ✨
Wishing you all a week of making purpose your bouncer,
* With thanks to Priya Parker for the insight that "purpose is your bouncer", from her brilliant book "The Art of Gathering".
