CHOOSE

Are you being too flexible?

Are you being too flexible?

I’ve done more yoga this year than ever before, and I love both the movement and the insights I get on the mat.

So often something a yoga teacher says will strike a chord.

My most recent a-ha moment was about conscious flexibility - actively choosing when to stretch and when not to.

It linked so clearly for me into our personal boundaries.

Lots of us can stretch, accommodate, adjust.

We can hang out in our flexibility. It can become part of who we are.

We can extend ourselves but hurt ourselves in the process.

We can push ourselves beyond our limits trying to keep up with others.

Sometimes its good to stretch - we don’t want to turn into statues.

Sometimes it’s not - we don’t want to snap.

Has your to do list lost its way?

Has your to do list lost its way?

In a recent coaching session with the brilliant Sue Belton, I realised that my to do list had lost its way.

It was no longer a summary of the key actions to take to move forward.

It had turned into a long list of things I could do, a faffing-around-the-edges list.

It wasn’t useful any more.

It used to be. But I’ve spent the last 18 months working through it, and also added a lot of useful structures and systems in place (hello scheduling!).

I still have things I want to focus my attention on, but so much more of what I do has a consistent rhythm.

I’m keeping things moving rather than starting from scratch.

It feels VERY weird. And quite uncomfortable too.

How do you feel about changing your mind?

How do you feel about changing your mind?

How do you feel about changing your mind?

About unravelling a decision.

About saying no to something that felt like a wholehearted yes when you started? Or vice versa?

It can be hard to reverse a decision that once felt good.

And yet it’s really important to pay attention to where you are now, rather than where you were when you started.

Because circumstances can change. And so can you.

What would be the most...?

What would be the most...?

When you feel like there’s a right answer to something, and you’re not sure what it is, how do you feel?


Energised and open? Excited by all the possibilities?

Probably not.

Stuck? Anxious? Scared of getting it wrong? Worried you’ll make a mistake that can’t be undone?

More likely!

Often we can get really stuck trying to work out the right answer to something.

Which way to go? Which direction to pick? Which option to choose?

It can feel black and white, as though one way is good and the other not. As though there’s no going back. The decision making process can feel tight, and stressful.

These types of right/wrong choices can come up in coaching conversations. Often around the big things, but often about the small things too.

How does the penny drop for you?

How does the penny drop for you?

There’s a magical moment when we go from knowing something rationally to really *knowing* it.

When the mists clear and the penny drops.

When we know exactly what’s right and what to do next.

It’s especially magical when we’ve been sitting with something for a while. A big decision. A life choice. A crossroads. When something that has been stuck unlocks.

So how do you get to that point?

Why it's useful to be specific

Why it's useful to be specific

“Should I make this less specific?”

I’ve had a few people ask me this question in coaching sessions recently.

They feel they ‘should’ be bringing bigger ‘meta’ issues.

They worry that by being specific they are focusing in on too small a thing - or narrowing their options too much.

They think they should focus on the bigger picture rather than one piece of the puzzle.

When this happens I tell them that it’s generally really useful to be specific.

No more perfect pupil!

No more perfect pupil!

One of my new favourite ways to spend Sunday morning is in a warm yoga class at my local studio.


It’s the perfect balance of relaxing and intense (even though I’m always lulled into a false sense of security by the gentleness of the first 15 minutes!).

And this week it came with the added bonus of a huge a-ha moment.


As we settled into our mats the yoga teacher (the brilliant Kayleigh) set up the session.

She reminded us that it was our practice. At any time we could take a break or make a change.

I’ve heard this before and know it makes sense. I’m even getting better at actually doing it :-)

But her next sentence really landed it for me:

“Just because I tell you to do something, doesn’t mean you have to”.

Game changer.

When you're stuck in indecision, it can help to choose your regret

When you're stuck in indecision, it can help to choose your regret

When you need to make an important decision, what comes up for you?

 

Do you agonise over the choices, worrying about what will happen if you make the wrong one?

Do you instinctively know which one feels right, but can’t quite bring yourself to make the final call?

Does it feel like you are stuck in the same thought cycle of pros and cons?

The power of thinking out loud

The power of thinking out loud

Do you ever ask a question out loud to someone, and then immediately answer it yourself without need them to speak? This happens to me all the time.

I know I’m not alone, and last week I learned a new term for it.

‘Rubberducking’ is a hack in software development, and is the act of describing a coding problem to an inanimate object that won’t judge you, that often leads to finding the solution just a few moments later.